Chapter 1 – Ito
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Translator’s Note:
Heyas folks,
just recently I found this little, fun novel. It’s a kinky rom-com story, something I usually don’t translate, but since the dynamic between the MC and FMC is fun, and the general flow of the story is pretty decent, I thought I’d give this a shot.
If you like what you see, spread the word and comment/like/subscribe on Patreon. I’ll continue with this novel depending on reader reception. Or to be very blunt, low interest = drop, high interest = good release rate
Thanks to ApoWo for editing this. 🙂
Have fun reading!
– Shasu
As a boy I was always envious of adults, but now that I’ve become one myself, I’ve learned that being an adult is extremely stifling. And definitely not something to be proud of.
Back then I was completely convinced that your stats would go up across the board when you became an adult, because what are adults if not the natural evolution of children? But nothing like that happened at all. In fact, nowadays I often find myself looking back on my childhood fondly.
Running from bad stuff, having high expectations towards yourself, having high expectations towards others, and even making friends; if we could do all these things now as easily and innocently as we did as children, our relationship might have been better for both of us. I might have been able to become someone who can be proud of himself.
We would have been able to build a stable relationship that balanced the distance between us.
Complaining about our bosses at work, playing games together, sharing movies we want the other to watch, and wholeheartedly supporting each other’s romances and marriages.
It would have been great if my relationship with Ito had taken such a shape.
＊＊＊
If I started neglecting my meals, then everything really would be over. Based on that feeling, I bought lunch at a food truck at least once a week while at work.
Whenever the clock struck noon, small queues formed at the various food trucks lined up at the entrance to my company’s office building. We had moved into the building recently. The building housed all sorts of companies, so the people who lined up in the queues were also dressed in all sorts of styles.
Some people were in sharp suits with stylish haircuts, straddling the line between looking inappropriate or just athletic, while others wore such casual attires that you’d expect that they might go to the aquarium right after this. It was obvious from a single glance that the majority of those in casual wear belonged to the same company. After all, they all had an employee ID card with a game character, which represented their company, hanging from their necks.
I also belonged to that company. However, today I was wearing an even more casual outfit, one more suited to someone who had nipped out to the convenience store, much less an aquarium.
As I stood at the end of the queue for the truck selling roast beef bowls, looking like I’d much rather be anywhere else instead, if I had any say in this, I sensed someone joining the queue behind me. Probably a woman.
Turning back for no particular reason, I glanced at her face.
At once, I got goosebumps and felt like I had forgotten how to breathe.
“I-Ito?”
“Eh? Fuyu-kun?”
When she looked up from the smartphone in her hand, it became clear that it really was Ito, just as I had expected. Ito’s eyes also widened upon seeing me.
And then, almost at the same time, both of us looked down at each other’s ID cards. The logo of a construction firm was depicted on Ito’s card. The same place I heard about during the last drinking party our club held before graduation.
“Oh, I see…your company is in this building as well, huh?”
“Fuyu-kun, yours as well? I didn’t notice at all.”
“We just moved into this building in April.”
“Ah, no wonder the number of people in casual clothes has increased since last month!”
Despite the unexpectedness of our reunion and how awkward our relationship actually was, Ito looked truly happy to see me. Her smile was just like it used to be – it made me so nostalgic I almost cried, and managed to coax a smile out of me as well.
She was wearing a typical office outfit consisting of a blouse, checkered vest, and a skirt. Her light brown hair was held together with a barrette. Her light make-up was the finishing touch to her look, something that seemed much more settled and calmer than in the past.
By the end of our short exchange, I had reached the head of the queue. I ordered, and while the food wagon’s employee put my order together, I plucked up the courage to invite Ito.
“We could eat together, if you like? There’s some space on the bench over there.”
“Ah, sorry. I’m here with the people from my company so…” Ito’s eyes wandered to another food truck.
Apparently, her companions were in line for a different truck. It only made sense, I guess.
I tried not to let my disappointment at the refusal show on my face, but before I could say anything else, Ito added, “But, it’s been such a long time, so how about we go out for a drink? Do you have some time today?”
I didn’t expect an offer like this, and let out an embarrassingly shrill grunt of assent on instinct. But then I realized what I had agreed to and quickly backpedaled.
“Oh, umm…I’ve got to work overtime today. Would another day do?”
“Sure. Then, how about──”
In the end, I managed to secure a promise to go out drinking together. We parted ways after that. Even as she waved goodbye, Ito kept up her smile.
Inside the elevator, a flood of emotions overwhelmed me. I was surprised and overjoyed but mostly I felt a sense of relief.
That was close. Going out drinking with my ex in an outfit only fit for heading out to buy something at a local convenience store would be embarrassing to say the least, right?
＊＊＊
It’s been three years since I, Yamase Fuyu, broke up with Minase Ito. Right before the summer of my fourth year at university. Our relationship lasted three years, starting the summer of our first year at university, when we met as members of the SciFi Research Club.
For me, Ito symbolized my time at university, the best period of my life. She was also the person who had allowed me to experience the purest form of love I had experienced in all years on this earth. However, we grew apart, chasing different things in our jobhunt and our lives, eventually breaking up that summer. Yet, it’s not like I’ve ever hated her. Rather, I broke up with her because I didn’t want to start hating her.
Therefore, I was quite happy to be miraculously reunited with her, with no ill will lingering between us. Since it wasn’t particularly awkward, it seems that she’s pretty positive about this whole thing too.
It’s truly the first time in three years we’ve been able to enjoy some sake together. We’re both 24 now, genuine adults. My expectations were very high. Of course I had a few ulterior motives. It’s not weird for things to end up like that when exes go out drinking together, right? It’s fine for me to harbor some hopes, right?
While hiding that faint lustful desire in my “lucky” briefs, I waited for Ito in front of the station.
“Sorry for making you wait, Fuyu-kun.”
Ito wove her way towards me through the throng of people in a white, knitted blouse and an emerald flare skirt. Maybe it’s only natural, but her get-up and color combination is a lot more adult than before.
“Oh, nice! A fish restaurant. It definitely has great Japanese sake, right?”
“I hope it’ll meet your expectations.”
“Pleeease, Yamase-kuuun, you’re my last hope here!”
“Who are you supposed to be?”
Either because it was Friday or because she simply loved booze, Ito seemed to be rather excited. In contrast to her unfamiliar, mature outfit, her way of talking hadn’t changed at all.
Having said that, perhaps that’s just because she doesn’t show me the parts of her that have changed.
For the time being, I booked a table in the most unobtrusive and nicest place among the restaurants I know of. I felt a little floaty, and I was astonished to realize just how unexpectedly nervous I was.
＊
“Mmh, so goood!”
It took just one bite of lean tuna for a smile to bloom on Ito’s face. She lifted her sake cup to take a sip.
We were in a Japanese restaurant allowing you to enjoy fresh fish and Japanese rice wine. Likely because of the overall adult atmosphere, everyone kept their voices appropriately low and the restaurant was quiet, despite being packed. Everyone had come here to let the work week slip away with some high-class sake so everyone took care to enjoy their fare without disturbing others.
“You sure know some classy places. Did you come here with your colleagues or something?”
“No, my colleagues…ah, nevermind. Yep, I came here with my colleagues before.”
Knowing that if I said no, the next question would have been who I did come here with, I just said yes instead. I did come here before, with a girl I met through a dating app, but there was no need to tell Ito about that.
That night, the girl whose last name I never learned, brought me here, made me pay for all the expensive food and then broke off all contact with me the next day. I wonder whether she’s doing fine right now under the same sky.
Yeah, right. Eat dirt, stupid bitch.
“How’s your company doing? What kind of stuff are you working on right now?”
“I’m a director’s assistant for a social game.”
Once I told her the game’s title, Ito ooh’ed in admiration.
“I’ve heard about it! They’ve been running commercials for it, right? That’s incredible, isn’t it!?”
“Well, being the director’s assistant is a convenient coordination role. Although I feel like I live between a rock and a hard place now…”
Oops, why would I make her listen to me whine about work? Me complaining about work serves no purpose whatsoever. Gotta get away from that topic. Away.
“Let’s talk about something else. Have you met anyone else from the club?”
“Every once in a while. Omii and Haru-ccho.”
“Oh, so the three girls in our club are still as tight-knit as ever, eh?”
“Nah, we get together a lot less frequently now. They’re both very chummy with their boyfriends.”
Boyfriends!
The word had popped up so perfectly, so I tried to capitalize on it, but before I could even open my mouth, Ito asked me in return, “What about you, Fuyu-kun? Are you still meeting with the club members?”
Argh, she went back. She went back to the original topic. I missed my chance!
“At this point, we don’t really meet anymore, but…we still go on a trip with just the guys every year. I mean, Uchida-san, Ueki, and Yamada.”
“Whoa, that sounds fun. How nice.”
That doesn’t matter at all.
“Speaking of Yamada-san…”
Yamada doesn’t matter at all.
Do you have a boyfriend right now? Or do you have someone you like? How many boyfriends have you had since we broke up? I want to somehow push the conversation into this direction. No wait, that last question would be kind of like shooting my own foot.
Seeing how Ito invited me out tonight, I guess she’s currently available.
No, but if she just thinks of me as a friend, then she could still have a boyfriend.
No, no, say what you want, I’m her ex, so I can’t just be a friend, right?
No, no, no, women occasionally pull out that terrifying 『just friends』 thing, so don’t let your guard down, me!
My thoughts, which were fueled by carnal lust, swirled round and round inside my head. As I was distracted, I didn’t pay much attention to our conversation either. I felt as if I was playing Speed. I was solely focused on spotting the opportunity to put down the card called love talk.
While my focus was elsewhere, I suffered an attack from an unexpected direction.
“Ouch!”
“Eh? What’s wrong, Fuyu-kun?”
“Sorry, sorry, it’s nothing. I’ve just been getting this pain inside my eyes every once in a while.”
A stinging pain had pierced from my eyeball into my brain. It was because I spent all day staring at monitors all the time. This pain had occurred several times in the last few weeks, but I hadn’t really minded it much.
Yet, Ito reacted in a surprising way.
“Are you okay? That’s definitely eyestrain. Are you letting your eyes rest properly?”
“It’s no problem. This is fine. Usually it goes away when I sleep.”
“But, it’s dangerous when it happens too frequently, you know? Here, use this.”
Ito held out a disposable, hot eye mask, looking quite worried. I was a little surprised to see her so unexpectedly worried about me.
At the same time, I suddenly felt something else.
Huh?
Did talking to Ito always feel like this? What did I enjoy the most back when I dated her? My head is full of special memories, but thinking back on normal times, we always just had random, aimless chit-chat. Ito and I had great chemistry when it came to conversations. We both had similar pacing and liked using peculiar turns of phrase.
Ito mentioned that she had always loved how I would return everything she said to her three fold, and then put some icing on the cake as well. To this day, I don’t quite understand what she meant.
Either way, all sorts of topics bubbled forth between Ito and me whenever we saw each other.
Our happy three years were built on a mountain of casual conversations between the two of us. So why am I trying to rush things so much? Why am I only focused on the card called love talk?
Because I got caught up in all the emotions that welled up from our reunion, I ended up missing the important things.
“Eyestrains are often rooted in stress.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, really. That’s why I was worried about you. Your face…it’s been a long time since I saw you but you look really exhausted…”
“Huh? I do?”
“Yeaaah! I wonder if you’re truly okay. Whether you’ve got someone you can talk to about the things hurting you, about the things upsetting you.”
‘Am I overstepping? I am worried, but is that just going to worry him more? What do I do if he thinks I’m just being nosy?’ Seeing such complicated feelings written on Ito’s face, I suddenly ran out of steam.
Ito has been terribly worried about me. Ever since we reunited.
Once I realized this, I was suddenly brought back down to earth. And now that I was grounded again, I was assailed by violent pangs of shame.
Why am I getting all hyped up by myself? Why am I trying so hard? Why am I just looking for an opportunity to push my own agenda? Just what did I think about my ex-girlfriend who had been worrying about me so much?
Shit, how embarrassing! Makes me want to kill the version of me from several minutes ago!
“What’s wrong, Fuyu-kun? Does it still hurt?”
“No, my eye is fine. Rather than that…I somehow feel happy.”
On the one hand, I felt ashamed, but on the other hand, an indescribable euphoria filled my chest. For as long as I have known her, Ito has always been very sensitive about other people’s feelings. She even guessed the pain I never articulated.
Ito was just as kind as she had ever been. For me, that realization was much more auspicious and delightful than being told, 「I’m single right now」.
“Getting so happy over being treated a little nicely…just what sort of hell is your usual daily life?” Ito joked while looking embarrassed.
“No, you got it wrong. It’s because it’s you. How do I put it…? Oh yeah…I’m just happy to be able to talk with you like this again.”
“What’s up with that? Weirdo.”
“Talking with you has a feel similar to playing Sevens.”
“The heck? What Sevens? I don’t have the Nine of Diamonds, though.”
“Right, I haven’t forgotten about how you went to 『Body Worlds』 all by yourself five years ago while keeping it secret from me. Even though I wanted to go with you.” 1
“Argh! So that was the Nine of Diamonds, eh!? Or rather, you held a grudge over that!”
They both noticed that they had raised their voices in excitement and, as if they had rehearsed it, lowered their voices at the same time. They laughed while making sure to muffle their voices.
“So, what’s going on, Fuyu-kun? There has to be a reason for your eye to be acting up, right?”
“Ah, yeah. I mentioned it earlier, but being the director’s assistant for a social game is like an obstacle course, or rather…you’re everyone’s punching bag.”
“Oh…kinda like you can’t make either side happy, no matter what you do?”
“Right. The administrators and the developers; they only think about themselves. The people at the top pretend to not see any of the shit going on since they’re busy with a new project. Finally, last Wednesday before I met you, the director actually said that 『Assistants sure got it easy』 …”
“Oof, that’s a low blow. Now I understand why you looked like a zombie back then.”
Afterwards, complaints about my workplace gushed out of me like an everlasting spring. Despite having been reunited with Ito after a long time and having delicious fish food and sake in front of me, I filled the time with nothing but boring whining. That wasn’t how it was supposed to be.
But, Ito kept listening to me attentively the whole time. She sympathized with me and occasionally went along with what I was saying, creating an atmosphere making it easy for me to vent all my pent-up frustration.
I let myself be spoiled by her consideration , and stopped giving a damn about things like whether or not she had a boyfriend. Rather, I even started to think that this sort of relationship between us might actually be better. We didn’t need to act tough or be particularly considerate of each other. Because we used to be a couple in the past, we can readily expose our weaknesses to each other. The perfect friendship, so to say.
Complaining about our bosses at work, playing games together, sharing movies we want the other to watch, and wholeheartedly supporting each other’s romances and marriages.
It would have been great if my relationship with Ito had taken such a shape.
＊
When I woke up, my eyes settled on a ceiling that was exceedingly familiar. And a pillow and bed perfectly suited to me. And yet, I had an intense feeling that something was out of place.
Next to me was Ito, snoring lightly.
She was wrapped up in a blanket. Her feet sticking out of the blanket, her neck and chest…all her skin so white that it looked as though you could spoil it with the slightest touch.
It was the same sight as in the past.
“Ouch…!”
The instant my brain processed the sight before my eyes, I felt a stinging pain deep inside my eyes. It traveled from the back of my head right into my eyeball. Like my eye was being stabbed.
“Ah…”
Ito also woke up. She pulled the blanket up to her chin and looked around to try and figure out the situation. She had “oops” written all over her face.
I buried my face in the pillow, at the end of my wits. I couldn’t endure looking at that expression on Ito’s face or reality any longer.
Then I whispered into the pillow so quietly that Ito wouldn’t be able to hear, “Am I an idiot or what…!?”
Regret surged through me, so violently that I felt like I wanted to die right here and now.
With this, things between us would be over for good. I was convinced of that. Seriously, this was the worst possible way to wake up there was
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Translation Notes: