Hachinan tte, sore wa nai deshou! – Friendship Visit Group – Part 3

Heyas folks,

I saw in the comments for the last release that some of the readers are unhappy about me using a mild version of Shakespearean English for the new character Therese. Well, sorry for that but I won’t change it unless some native English speaker shows me a better way to express an archaic language style. The author went out of his way to add some individuality to a character after all.

Criticizing is always easy, but being part of the solution is much more preferable than being part of the problem.

I’m always open to suggestions in that regard (especially as I have no native English editor for this series even after asking quite a few times in the past), otherwise I will keep at it until the author decides to change her speech pattern.

This is part 3 of 4, enjoy~

~ Thanks to the Patrons of Hachinan for their support! ~

7 Comments

  1. No worries! My teacher made my class study the classics including “Romeo and Juliet” while I was in middle school. So the language is not totally unknown to me. It took a bit of effort for my rusty brain, but I could make out what the character is saying.
    Just don’t ask me to do the play again!

  2. The problem with using Shakespearean for her is that it just doesn’t make sense. It’s one thing to speak politely or use an accent to denote a certain prestige or “nobleness” in a character (Hello Sir Smith, would you please follow me to dinner?), it’s another to use an overdramatized stage speaking style from 500 years ago. Unlike Japanese this is just too jarring in English and can easily break immersion in the story.

    I won’t force you to change your mind, but I personally think this is a poor choice for a translation, especially if you’re bothering to adapt the quirks to English instead of keeping the literal Japanese quirks intact. As overused as it is, an old posh style British accent would probably work better here.

    • Hello,

      thanks for your input. I’m not fixated on using Shakespearean English, it’s just the only archaic English style I know as non-native English speaker. Another reader pointed towards Victorian English style in a mail, which might be the “posh style” you are referring to? But since I wouldn’t know how to realize it as I don’t know that style I would either need some pointers how to go about it or a native English speaker who would be willing to edit at least Therese’s speech for me until I get the general gist of how this English style works. πŸ™‚

      • Don’t have time to be an editor, but if you search “speaking old posh british” or “speaking british RP” you can find some resources on the topic.

  3. Thou mangled crook-pated minnows, I bite my thumb at thy criticism!

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